Funny Facts of Life

Thereís a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.

Donít worry about the world ending todayÖ
Itís already tomorrow in New Zealand.
(unless youíre in New Zealand -then start worrying)

Thereís too much fraternising with the enemy.

Outside of a dog, a book is manís best friend. Inside of a dog, itís too dark to read.

Character is what you are.
Reputation is what people think you are.

Drive carefully
Itís not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.

A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work..

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

A man who says marriage is a 50-50 proposition doesnít understand two things: 1 - Women, 2 - Fractions.

Money canít buy happiness. But it sure makes misery easier to live with.

It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book. COROLLARY: If you are given a take-home test, you will forget where you live.

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

On the other hand, you have different fingers.



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